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Accountability |

For Individuals

At Choice Awarenesss we have defined a set of characteristics about accountability partners for individuals.

Starter Character Set For Partners

Our starter character set is in list form and is only a starting point for your consideration.

Select from the list that which works best for you and add to it as you require.

Also, use it when you speak with a prospective partner. Better yet, have your partner review this page before you meet for the first time: let them bring their questions and ideas about what would work for them to your first meeting.

Feel free to enlarge this list as needed:

  1. A loving and considerate person

  2. A good sense of humor, especially able to laugh at themselves

  3. Able to articulate their beliefs which at a minimum will include faith in themselves and others (plus - see higher power in 10.)

  4. Considers themselves an aspirant - committed to learning and discovery

  5. Possessing Character - able to speak truth, know it and see it in others

  6. Willing to be non-judgmental and strong capacity to listen closely

  7. Demonstrates morality in their behavior; able to keep confidences

  8. Possesses consistent patterns of behavior - ability to contribute

  9. On the CAM Awareness Scale, rated overall at least an 8 or better.

  10. Finally and preferably, they are connected spiritually in some manner (i.e. whether deep within themselves and/or a higher power other than themselves or outside of themselves). This does not refer to a religion.

Meeting Focus

The objective is to hold yourself accountable for the outcomes - those important things that you commit and verbally promise that you will accomplish, simply by making it known what you wish to do. Summarize your outcomes to not more than three items for weekly meetings and experiment with a number for a longer periodic meeting - every two or 4 weeks, depending upon your special needs.

Focus you attention to the deliverable and not the details of the deliverable but what may prevent you from getting attainment - this is usually present in the "What's" of getting there; before your meeting look closely inside your purpose, people, process and participation of it. Don't share confidential information that doesn't need to be inside the conversation - it only clouds the uncovering and revealing process. Encourage you and your partner to stay present with what worked and didn't.

Your partner can ask questions of you each session for the express purpose of you seeing patterns, stoppages, etc.: these hindrances could be long-held beliefs, opinions, preferences or past behaviors which are just not working today for you. Each person has a fixed time-slot of 10 to 15 minutes each meeting, one goes first speaking, while the other listens and asks questions.

You share and give undivided attention with your partner and they with you - uncritically and without judgment.

(Wisdom Sidebar) Listening is an important subject these days and "Active Listening" ideas don't  cut it anymore - read Sharon Drew Morgan's recent blog and read her upcoming new book.

It is a long-term committed relationship that binds you together.

You are to help each other be present and honest with each other.

Meet In Person

We prefer you meet in person to discuss the character set frankly and openly when you are selecting a partner.

Get to know each other and discuss how you would handle issues and challenges; listening is a key strategy which works well and asking questions such as "How could you do this differently?" helps surface awareness for the other person.

We prefer never making critical judgment of the other person or telling the other how to do something. That's not what accountability is about - it is about you keeping your own commitments and understanding what get's in the way of you doing that. Over time you will gain awareness of what is occurring.

Setup a regular routine where you meet in person for the first 30 days - giving yourself enough time to know how each other communicates, how to surface what works and what does not: define and refine your accountability process and determine what tends to keep you focused toward you keeping the commitments you make. If problems arise (they will), stay and work through what is occurring. You will learn more than you think initially possible, if you give it a chance to work. After each of you have a good understanding, move to the telephone mostly but meet in person at least once every 6 to 8 weeks.

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Look in New Places

We also suggest that the person you seek is not in your current circle of relationships. But, they are very likely in the social and business communities where you want to participate.

Seek people with similar traits to yourself and find them in your community domains of experience, professions, and industries.

You will gain from searching and having these conversations with people. 

The right person will present themselves at just the right moment for you - be patient and wait for that moment.


See the next in the series of Services Pages to gain an understanding of Accountability for Businesses by clicking Learn More...

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